You know what’s a sizeable slice of (SFW) equine phallus?

Borderlands 2

Available: 26 October 2012
This game will unlock in approximately 1 month, 1 week, 2 days and 13 hours

Really?! On PC?! I want you to cancel that magical lollipop land of dreams image held by the Japan fans. Man just wants to get his gun and robots on. Hilariously, this could have been avoided, had I gone for the PS3 version. And a birthday present, too. Just goes to show how much of a spanner in the works localisation is when locked into a digital platform that recognises region before account details. I severely doubt sales would be harmed by letting the PC version run into the Japanese wilderness – Japan being Japan and the awkward relationship it has with PC gaming, after all.

Still, plenty to play until then. Cannot keep up this token Millennial gamer outrage, it’s thoroughly exhausting.